ESSAY-LETTER FROM HUGO, EMPEROR, APARTMENT 29 D1 TO TORA AND KUMA, MINISTERS OF LUCK AND FORTUNE RE: SUPPOSED OBLIGATORY FELINE ROLES OF MISFORTUNE WITHIN A QUESTIONABLE LITERARY, SOCIAL, AND LEXICOGRAPHICAL CONSTRUCT
I read your correspondence of 23 February 2018 with some interest. Certainly, you aspire to the noblest ideals: that is, striving to perform, to the best of your abilities, the duties of your office. There is a sad shortage of youth who take a careful look at the obligations of their position as they seek to achieve the noble benchmark of best practices.
I certainly understand the deep conflicts you express. Heavy is the soul that wears the coat that the two of you wear, for it is subject to certain expectations, particularly in and around the date of October 31st. At the same time, with the full appreciation of the traditional perceptions of values that most believe you must hold dear, I offer a voice of dissent.
In addition to speaking from my advanced years, I speak as one bound in my own coat. It has, by its very chromatic nature, caused me to research both sides of a binary issue, the Yin and Yang, you might say. I am neither one thing, nor another; I often myself in the challenging position of being both.
Now then, to write the issue on the head of a pin: you both believe that, being that your coat is the color it is, you are obligated to assume roles of harbingers of doom. Furthermore, you assume that, assigned this role, you are to relish it, and take joy in bringing misfortune to others.
It is understandable that you would feel, in not just your desire to bring the opposite of these things to your subjects and tenants, but in your success at bringing them such positive things, a deep conflict. Besides generations of societal tradition—not to mention the cultural weight of vast swaths of cultural folklore—there is also the constant, unrelenting clarion call of our very English language, telling you, at every turn, that, due to your coat, your motives and very being must be sinister.
Similarly, it follows that the reverse is true; that those whose coats are the opposite of yours are all that is noble, lucky, fortuitous, and well intentioned.
Let me tell you ladies that having having brought luck and good fortune to my loyal subject--and having taken pride and pleasure in doing so--I have seen that both of the shades of my markings are noble, and that this is not, as they say, a zero sum game. Yes, the virtues of half of my markings are legion—the traditional colors of daylight, justice, truth, and so forth—but does this mean that the other half of my markings are dark, unjust, and devoted to lies and deception? Certainly not.
For that same half of my being is the color of the night sky, under which countless souls have pondered, wondered, dreamed, and written words of possibilities and change, declarations of love and devotion. And I remind you that in the writing of these declarations, tyranny is a bright, blank, rectangular void, while it is the letters themselves that pierce this empty place and give it its very life and soul. Even as I sit here and see the words form as I dictate this correspondence to my faithful valet and subject, I see, in letter after letter, the good fortune that they give me; they are a color that absorbs all the light that touches them, and therefore contain the wisdom of the ages.
Therefore I say to you: perhaps you are the way you are because your actual role is the role you presently serve among your tenants and subjects, a role in which it is entirely appropriate for you to feel joy and satisfaction. Your subjects and tenants need good fortune, inspiration, and happiness.
The way you look, the very way you are, is a sign that you are there to give it them. They hunger for all that is positive, and given that, I posit that your appearance is not a harbinger of all that is negative; you are, the two of you, beacons of all that is good for people who dearly desire and deserve it, and are therefore who you are by popular demand.
Apartment 29 D1